How seniors ate in their own homes can indicate how well they’ll adapt to residence life
Food! At school, at camp, in hospital—as kids, teens or adults—whenever two or three are gathered, there’s talk about food. No wonder it’s a lightning rod in retirement residences, too. Hasn’t every food services manager said to themselves, “It’s nutritious, it’s hot, it’s nicely presented – so what’s the issue?” Food is so much more than nutrition; it’s number one on the hierarchy of needs for a reason. It’s our physical sustenance, yes, but it’s also a primal urge that invokes the most basic instincts in everyone, and its role is absolutely vital among seniors.
A senior is the product of a life’s experiences, but how often do we apply this to their relationship with food? Finding out how the senior was living before joining your residence (what were they eating, when and with whom?) gives you a major clue to understanding their physical, mental and emotional well-being, and for setting them up to be a successful and happy part of your community.
Let’s see what some real-life examples have to teach us.
Lauren
Lauren had kept a beautiful house and generous table, and her parties were legendary. How she cherished her dining room set—and how she grieved when there was no room for it in her new suite. She resented having no input into menus and became a shrill critic in the dining room, scolding the servers and sending things back “until it’s right”.
Dr. Elisabeth Kübler-Ross’s groundbreaking 1969 book, “On Death and Dying”, defined the five stages of grief—denial, anger, bargaining, depression and acceptance. These stages originally referred to death, but they apply equally to any unwelcome change in our lives. In Lauren’s case, she had defined herself as a hostess and provider of food and comfort, the symbol of which was her beloved dining room set. Lauren fixated on this furniture and focused her anger on its loss as a way of deflecting her real grief over the reality of the death of her husband and her own changed circumstances. Food, therefore, became the object of her misplaced rage at the loss of her self-image and role in life.
How to help?
- Lauren could only cope with the loss of her perceived role in life by replacing it with something similar to restore her self-esteem, so the existing primary school’s visit-and-read program was expanded to include cooking and baking lessons given by Lauren.
- Lauren became a gracious “ambassador,” giving tours and greeting at social events.
- Lauren restored her role as hostess by giving luncheon, bridge and dinner parties in the private dining room and consulting with the chef to perfect her favourite menus.
Ralph
Ralph moved into the retirement residence to be close to his wife, who was in the heavy-care unit. A vegetarian, diabetic, master vegetable gardener and talented amateur chef, he had lost weight after a heart attack, but given his lack of appetite, was concerned that everything he ate be as fresh and nutritious as possible. “I don’t think this outfit understands vegetarian cooking! I’ve got a little kitchen. I think I’ll make my own food—then I can eat what and when I like!”
One of the greatest frustrations of a senior’s life is being dismissed or condescended to and having their knowledge and experience overlooked. Life skills and interests do not disappear at a certain age, and hobbies are essential to keeping well. Ralph’s combination of knowledge and skill meant that he had the potential to make a valuable contribution to the community. Fortunately, management had the wisdom to recognize it.
How to help?
- Allow flexible meal plans. If a resident can shop and cook safely in their suite, they should be encouraged to do so. However, it’s always a good idea to have dinner in the dining room a few times a week to prevent isolation and encourage friendships.
- Enable “anytime” meals with breakfast, lunch and healthy snack supplies in a central location for residents who prefer to “graze” rather than maintain strict mealtimes.
- Create a menu advisory committee to have input into meals, ingredients and food preparation.
- Encourage green-thumbed residents to grow fresh herbs and veggies in a backyard or on a rooftop or windowsill.
- Set up cooking sessions, demos or classes—especially for the male residents.
- Be open-minded. Maybe an amateur cook could teach the chef a few tips and techniques.
Anne
Anne was widowed at 28 with two young kids to raise. After a full day of teaching, cooking was the least of her interests and the family “ate out of tins,” says her daughter, Jenny. Once she had retired and the kids left home, Anne’s interest in cooking dwindled to tea, toast and an occasional apple. When a bad cold turned into pneumonia, Jenny was horrified when the hospital reported her mother had malnutrition, and advised that she move to assisted living. After a week in her new home, Anne said proudly, “I’ll never eat a meal alone again!”
Social isolation and loneliness tend to increase as people age, as family and friend networks become smaller and social contacts decrease after retirement. There are also the deaths of family members and friends, as well as mobility difficulties and ill health. A related concern in the elderly is the reported decline in food intake and the loss of the motivation to eat. All of this results in problems associated with the regulation of energy balance and the control of food intake, causing body weight loss due to social or physiological factors, or a combination of both.
Depression, often associated with loss or deterioration of social networks, is a common psychological problem in the elderly and a significant cause of loss of appetite. Furthermore, the elderly are major users of prescription medications, a number of which can prevent the proper absorption of nutrients, cause gastrointestinal symptoms and reduce appetite. Protein-energy malnutrition is associated with impaired muscle function, decreased bone mass, immune dysfunction, anemia, reduced cognition, poor wound healing, delayed recovery from surgery, and, ultimately, increased morbidity and mortality. Clearly, more than just “not eating” is at stake here.
How to help?
- Encourage a poor eater, by making meals a social activity. Match them up with appropriate tablemates to make mealtimes about friendship as well as nutrition.
- Know your new residents. Pair an isolated person with a buddy who will encourage, but not force, group activities.
- Offer healthy choices whenever food is served. A picky eater might ignore lunch but be hungry at teatime, so be sure there’s fruit as well as goodies on that platter!
These tales from the trenches relate to today’s seniors, but what about those upcoming cohorts—the Depression babies, wartime cohort and—brace yourself—the baby boomers! Educated, well-travelled, gastronomically sophisticated and raised to “do it their way,” they’ll challenge every aspect of food, delivery and service. They’ll want a range of cuisines, dietary restrictions, timing and venues, as well as knowledge and control of ingredients and preparation. But take heart—the changes you make now will be a great foundation, and they will create positive outcomes for this crop of seniors, too. After all, doesn’t every cohort deserve the best?
About Pat Irwin
